If the only reason you’ll ever walk up an escalator is to escape your own fart, or if you find yourself addicted to the daily McDealMeAHeartAttack, you might already be resigned to the fact that you’re not going to be a superstar athlete. Sure, it’s no reason to run into oncoming traffic, but it does mean you can forget about the money, the glory, the free shoes, the women (or men?), the drugs, and the court trials. But, it’s not like you really wanted those things anyways. What you really wanted was to see your name on the front page of section B of your local newspaper.
For those of you who want to make it into the sports industry, as a non-athlete, here are a few things that you might want to consider doing-especially if you’re interested in being the topic of conversation on the next Off The Record: throwing chairs, criticizing officials and the league, fighting over Cubans, working at the local DQ, and making fun of the French. These methods may not seem conventional, but they’ve worked for some, namely Bobby Knight, Brian Burke, George Steinbrenner, Mark Cuban, and of course Don Cherry.
Whether you tune into Sportscenter, Sportscentral, Sportsdesk or sports-discussion-at-the-dining-table-after-a-long-day-of-work, read the daily (or biweekly) newspaper or listen to the Fan 590, it seems that these guys are always grabbing the headlines-often without breaking a sweat. With no shortage of opinion, its no wonder the media loves it when these sports industry heavy-hitters grab the mic. But what’s more interesting is that every sports fan has an opinion of them: they either love’em or hate’em.
But why do we care? They aren’t doing 360 slams, making acrobatic saves, or knocking homers out of the park. The only reason we care is because we’re fascinated, and dare I say jealous, of their ability to maintain their drive and passion without compromise within the surreal world of sports.
Sure Bobby Knight’s past is highlighted with rage and inappropriate violence and comments, but below the surface is a pure passion for the game of basketball. And his commitment to winning is just as real as his frustration-something we can all relate to.
George Steinbrenner may be trying to buy his next world series, but at least he knows what he wants and he’s not letting anything get in the way. His drive and dedication to the Yankees has turned a perennial loser into a dynasty and NYY fans love it. Could you imagine how much less angst there would be in Toronto if Steinbrenner was the owner of the Leafs?
Speaking of rebuilding a team, Mark Cuban may be loud and outspoken, but his commitment to bringing a championship to the Mavs is even louder. Sure, running out onto the court to protect his players was not too bright, but you’ve got to admire a rich Internet geek willing to take on a seven foot, 250-pound basketball player for the sake of his team.
There are times when protecting your players doesn’t have to be physical. Portrayed as insensitive and selfish, Brian Burke’s comments are often offensive and untimely. But despite the comments, the Vancouver GM has shown he’s willing to go to bat for any of his Canucks. When Bertuzzi was getting crucified by the media, who do you think risked breaking two vertebrae of his own to defend him? Burke, that’s who.
And finally we have Don Cherry, whose colourful demeanour and honesty have gotten him into hot water recently. But despite the negative spins and attacks, Cherry’s fan base rallied to support him-a sign that his fans are as loyal as his love for the game of hockey in Canada.
In sports sections that are forever congested with regurgitated quotes, our notorious five are constantly painting the headlines with their bold personalities, bolder actions, and even bolder words. And whether you applaud them or jeer them, they are the off-stage actors who bring sports beyond a mere physical phenomenon. They bring an uncompromised reality to sports which can sometimes border on the unbelievable, and that’s what we admire about them.
