As you can probably tell by the title, Conrad: Lord Bilk of the Crosspurposes isn’t necessarily geared towards a university-age audience. When I took my seat in George Ignatieff Theatre, packed to capacity on opening night, I was pretty sure I was the only person there younger than the eponymous lord. But the charming fellow in the seat next to me, who turned out to be playwright Jim Bacque, is anything but stuffy. Before the play started, he had time to tell me a story from his student days at Trin in the 1950s, when he was able to convince the Varsity cheerleaders to dance for a photo-op on a table in Hart House’s Great Hall. He’s teamed up with former classmates Peter Russell and Martin Hunter for his latest work of mischief, this one directed at a target notoriously uncomfortable with criticism, Conrad Black.
Conrad picks up where most of the media left off, telling the story of the unflappable newspaper baron and his wacky friends and associates, all of whom share similarly skimpy pseudonyms. Bilk is haunted, Scrooge-style, by his former headmaster, who introduces himself as Bilk’s conscience and orders him to get his hands above the sheets. He is also treated to visits from his devoted and frivolous wife, and former PM Lady Thrasher (Margaret Thatcher), who—in the funniest bit in the play—defeats a block full of leering prisoners with her withering glare. The scheme Bilk eventually develops to buy the jail he’s stuck in makes more of a joke out of the American legal system than it does of Bilk. However, the plot takes a turn for the sinister when Bilk develops a scheme to privatize war.
Although this is, of course, not a realistic or tender portrayal of the man, actor Thomas Gaugh captures the weird charisma of the longsuffering know-it-all that inspired the play. Likewise, the poised and dignified Kay Montgomery offers an enjoyable caricature of the scariest British lady alive. The one character who would have benefited from a little more depth is Lady Bilk, who spends most of her time discussing her wardrobe and planning the redecoration of her husband’s cell. The real Barbara Amiel has generated plenty of poignant, interesting thoughts as a columnist for Maclean’s magazine. (She also contributed to The Varsity in the 1960s—Ed.)
Director Martin Hunter does everything he can to make Conrad’s jail cell, where most of the play is set, roomy. The obviously simple set consists of a wall (with graffiti that unfortunately does look as though it was composed by the play’s seventy-something creators), bed, and toilet. For all its highbrow references, some of the play’s most interesting humour stems from the peculiar social situation of talking to business associates in the place where you pee. The other prisoners, among whom Conrad finds an eager audience for his lectures on business, exist as disembodied voices shouting from offstage.
The play begins and ends with musical numbers, an anachronistic Gilbert & Sullivan parody that commands respect if only for successfully rhyming “slamma’” with “Obama.” The closing piece, also a parody, is not as strong, but is saved by a kick-ass solo from Lady Bilk, played by Martha Spence.
Though the audience was laughing through most of the show, Bacque and producer Peter Russell had difficulty finding a theatre willing to test out the potential legal minefield of portraying the lawsuit-happy prisoner in an unflattering light. You can’t really blame them, especially seeing that much of the play revolves around the main character’s legal machinations.
Russell, a pleasant 76-year-old who eagerly guided patrons to their seats, says there was a definite libel chill among a few theatres. Bacque has written a book about trying to get his work onstage, Putting on Conrad, due to be released in January. “People who do big things have big character flaws,” says Russell. It occurred to him that the story of Conrad Black would make a great play as he was watching Black’s melodramatic Chicago trial in 2007. As for the feelings of Conrad himself, which (such as they are) get a lot of attention in this play, Russell isn’t worried. “We think he’ll probably get a tickle out of it,” he says cheerfully.
Trinity College’s Theatre Month celebrates the 30th anniversary of the George Ignatieff Theatre. For more information on this month’s performances, which include Saints Alive! and No Exit, visit www.trinity.utoronto.ca.
