Dublin, Ireland
Arthur Guinness is a genius. Realizing the appeal beers would have in the next 100 years, he negotiated a 9,000-year lease at £45 per annum for an unused brewery we now know today as St. James’ Gate Brewery, the home of Guinness. The brewery will come up for lease again in year 10,759. Surprisingly, a pint of Guinness stout has as many calories as a big English breakfast.
Seoul, South Korea
Seoul is a fascinating city, and the young ladies and gentlemen are very stylish. My attention was drawn to a watermelon during my trip, because it costs 30,000 won for a single one, close to $30 CAD. I was shocked, and it reminded me of Mark Twain’s words: when one has tasted watermelon, he knows what the angels eat.
Lisbon, Portugal
The Galerias Romanas in Lisbon is an underground Roman gallery, said to be a portico crypt from the reign of Augustus, and is located at Lisbon’s downtown area. It’s open only once every September. Since much of the area is flooded, it takes up to a month to prepare this monument for public access. Waiting time can be up to 3.5 hours, and access is via a hole in the ground located in the middle of the street.
Chiang Mai, Thailand
Talk to any locals outside Chiang Mai and they will ask if you’ve been here. This city is a keystone of any journey to Thailand. I played with tiger cubs, kissed king cobras (non-venomous ones), had snake wines, watched elephants playing football, and had a monkey attack me. I did what I had to do. I’ve lived here!
Amsterdam, Netherlands
There were over 5,000 prostitutes in Amsterdam five years ago. Today, there are only 1,100. They come from all parts of the world, as young as 18 and as old as 83. They pay taxes, have their own hospital and church (which you can only enter through a hotel), and a strong union that managed to shut down four blue windows operated by male gigolos.
Fussen, Germany
Neuschwanstein Castle lies just 5km away from the Austrian border, and is located on a very high rugged hill. Standing from there looking below at all the trees and mountains made me feel like I was a king living in Lord of The Rings’ Minas Tirith or at Hogwarts.
Bordeaux, France
On June 21, the entire city turns into a nightclub to celebrate Fête de la Musique, an all-night music celebration of the summer solstice. Thousands flock around the city to display their musical talent, from street performance at its iconic Place de la Bourse, to dancing along its ancient Rue Fernand Philippart.
Rome, Italy
I made a wish at Trevi Fountain for my return to Rome to be ensured and realized the bottom of it was glistening with gold, silver, and bronze. Being the most famous Baroque fountain in the world, this fountain receives €5,000 per day. The money collected is used to feed Rome’s needy.
Jakarta, Indonesia
Huge malls such as Grand Indonesia are scattered across the city, and you can find street food everywhere. Prices range depending on how much food you take or how hungry you are. It’s sold by hawkers peddling their goods, such as mixed rice, satay, cakes, or tempeh, on bicycles or carts, notably around the Kemang Raya area.
Salzburg, Austria
There are Mozart impersonators everywhere. And they want money. They also do many things Mozart wasn’t famous for – breakdancing, rapping, acrobatics, balloon twisting, fire eating, magic, you name it. On the bright side, you will see some Mozarts playing piano or violin on the streets.
Gweynedd, Wales
Gweynedd has Europe’s longest town name in Welsh: Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. 58 letters in length, it translates into English as St. Mary’s Church in The Hollow of The White Hazel near to the Rapid Whirlpool of Llantysilio of the Red Cave. Seeing this made my day.
Kolkata, India
Called the “city of furious creative energy,” Kolkata is known among its people as the birthplace of modern Indian literary and artistic thought. I had a chance to visit the National Library of India and learned about Bengali literature and was lucky enough to sample some machher jhol, a local dish of rice and fish curry. That was the most productive flight transit time ever spent.
Bruges, Belgium
Bruges boasts some of the worlds’ finest chocolates and chocolatiers – and they all come in different packaging, flavours, decorationsº and human body parts. If those tiny truffles, marzipan, or tarts can’t satisfy your palate, you can try eating their two top-sellers: penis and breast-shape chocolates. I decided to buy a pair of DD-sized chocolate breasts for my relatives in London.
San Francisco, USA
In San Francisco, I chatted with the friendliest homeless guy I’d ever met. We talked for nearly an hour on Christmas Eve before I treated him to Burger King and Starbucks at 12 am. The homeless people of San Fran aren’t just the friendliest – they also have the most creative signs I’ve ever seen. “I slept with Lindsay Lohan last week – please help.”
Nairobi, Kenya
Most people stay for a night or two in transit, coming in and out as soon as they can. South-Eastern Africa is, to me, the best place to do parachuting. If you dare, go up 20,000 feet and jump down at 200 km/h while enjoying the view across the African savannah!
Oxford, England
As you walk around the colleges of Oxford University, be sure to look up once in a while. All over Oxford’s buildings are gargoyles (technically ™grotesques∫ as these don’t spout water): some in the shape of faces, some animals, and some entire people. The keenest of eyes will spot the funnier ones – the one picking his nose, the one relieving itself…
Tokyo, Japan
When I visited Tokyo, I got tired while wandering the streets and did a back squat outside a building while opening a white-powdered mochi bits caramel candy. Long story short, they thought I was begging for money and doing heroin. As the police dragged me away to the police station, I realized I was squatting behind Bank of Japan.
Phuket Islands, Thailand
Soft drinks served in a plastic bag, toilet paper used as a napkins on restaurant tables, gasoline in whisky bottles, and beach chairs made of plastic blue pipes – Thailand’s largest and most popular island has all it takes to amaze me. Phuket is famous for its surfing, so don’t forget your speedos!
Xi’an, China
Xi’an is a stop you cannot miss. It’s old and mysterious. Here, the first emperor of China, Qin Shi Huang, was buried amongst thousands of terracotta warriors. He started building a grandiose mausoleum at age 13, and its secrets and legends were lost with him over the years. Seeing the terracotta army and Mountain Li where the tomb is gave me an eerie sensation of how the world was once upon a time.
Shanghai, China
I entered a cab, and with my poor Chinese, struggled to tell the driver that I wanted to head to the airport. I showed him my passport, and he said it looks pretty. I acted like a plane, and he asked why I was acting like a chicken. I ended up in Shanghai’s busiest shopping street, Nanjing Road, in front of KFC and missed my flight to the Hainan Islands.
