1. A Red Bull from the cafeteria to keep me awake through my three-hour Monday evening lecture.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“I need Fuuuuuuel!”
2. The juiciest red apple from the residence cafeteria because I get hungry during my three-hour Monday evening lecture.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“An apple a day sort of keeps the existential agony away.”
3. Saint Laurent oval sunglasses to let me sleep in case the Red Bull stops working mid-lecture.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“Wow, they’re so mysterious UwU!”
4. The course textbook from the university bookstore because I still have not done any of the readings for this three-hour Monday evening lecture and I am utterly clueless.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“At this point, I need a miracle.”
5. Those shiny ashwagandha gummies that would’ve supposedly removed the debilitating feeling of doom that creeps up on me during my three-hour Monday evening lecture.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“Maybe I should return to Catholicism for some actual guilt relief.”
6. A pack of coloured pens to take notes with during my three-hour Monday evening lecture after my mom advised that I try seeing the world “in colour”.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“But no amount of colour can change the barren reality of my GPA…”
7. A Harvard University hoodie from a Salvation Army thrift store so that everyone in my three-hour Monday evening lecture figures I’m still recovering from being rejected three years ago.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“Awww, hopefully they get in for grad school….”
8. A new journal to write reflections in because this three-hour Monday evening lecture makes me achingly aware of my own mortality.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“I need to leave my mark on this world before I am taken from it.”
9. A sticker that said “Self-love is the best love” to keep me inspired during my three-hour Monday evening lecture as I try to recover the remnants of my ‘self’ through reflective journaling.
MILENA PAPPALARDO/THE VARSITY
“How can I love a self I don’t even know? Who even am I?”
10. More Red Bull cans, because I have another three-hour Monday evening lecture after this.
“What do you say we keep these good vibes going!”
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