Building your beer belly
Sometimes known as “Freshman 15,” the cautionary but probably true tale of the fatty pounds of first-year life seems to be losing steam. Generally believed to be caused by over-indulgence in alcohol, fast food, and late-night partying, the key weapon in fighting the mighty 15 seems to be by knowing your enemy. What causes the notorious Frosh 15, according to first-years? Stress, beer, all-you-can-eat cafeterias, and “those really good Sodexho cookies” were popular answers. Most frosh didn’t seem worried about falling prey to unhealthy habits, including one student who suggested that she might even shed some pounds. What will they have to say after a year of greasy cafeteria food, late night study sessions, and immeasurable quantities of beer?
Acquainting yourself with alcohol
The crux of many a university existence is the gratuitous ingestion of alcohol. Although most of the frosh didn’t look a day over 18, many proudly admitted to be fond of alcohol, including one student who said that he is “really looking forward to the nights of binge drinking.” On the topic of the best kinds of inebriation, one Trinity frosh said that “vodka-drunk is damn funny,” while others insisted rum was their drink of choice. Scientific studies, however, have favoured clearer liquors like vodka as they give a less severe hangover than more impure alcohols like brandy and rum. This year’s frosh had a strange, if not creative, assortment of personal tried-and-true hangover remedies. These included potato chips, bananas, Raisin Bran, Cheerios sans milk, and “anything especially greasy.” The residence dons, of course, generally forbade reckless alcoholism and advised lots of water before bed and the morning after.
Sleeping it off
Burning the midnight oil soon becomes an unpleasant reality for the majority of university students. Most of the frosh claimed to be already acquainted with sleepless nights, and offered these suggestions for dealing with the increased workload, time constraints, and excess partying: scheduling 15 minute power naps, planning ahead, simply sleeping less, and of course, any and every kind of caffeine. One student stubbornly insisted that he will not lose much sleep as he plans to complete his assignments and study for tests “the morning of.”
Method behind the madness
When it comes to laying out the welcome mats, no one does it better than the engineers who ceremoniously dunk, dip, and splatter their frosh with purple paint before classes start. Fortunately (or perhaps, unfortunately) this purple dye is not carcinogenic, as is rumoured. The dye is gentian violet, an anti-fungal agent that is commonly used to treat athlete’s foot and yeast infections. Frosh from other faculties unanimously declared they would never allow themselves to be dyed purple, their reasons ranging from not liking the colour to “We’re not retarded.” One student went so far as to say, “Thank God we’re not engineers!” Well, what’s a little purple paint if it’ll cure athlete’s foot?
-MAYCE AL-SUKHNI & SANDY HUEN
