Discussions about sex and relationships are more normalized than ever — or at least, that’s what we like to believe. TV shows and movies like Euphoria, The L Word, and Bottoms promote sex-positive messages, showcasing diverse expressions of desire and intimacy. But does this openness extend to all kinks and fetishes, or do certain fantasies still face judgment and stigma beneath the surface?
From stigma to acceptance
Older generations often prioritized tradition and privacy over open conversations about sex, particularly when it came to anything outside societal norms. Interests beyond conventional sex were frequently dismissed as ‘abnormal.’
Truly embracing unique fantasies requires more than just removing outdated medical labels.
For many years, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders categorized kinks as mental illness, disregarding the possibility of consensual and positive exploration. This perception persisted despite research from Psychology Today showing that consensual Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism (BDSM) practices enhance relationship satisfaction. The manual was finally updated in 2013 to correct this, but the International Classification of Diseases did not revise its false classification of kinks and fetishes until 2022.
These medical classifications reflected societal fears of deviating from traditional relationship models and forms of intimacy. Increased sex education for younger generations has helped unlearn many of the deep-rooted judgments society perpetuated over time.
Although progress has been made, stigmas around sexual fantasies still persist. Truly embracing unique fantasies requires more than just removing outdated medical labels.
From Sex Education to social media
It’s undeniable that mainstream media plays a massive role in shedding light on kinks and fetishes. Films like Babygirl, television shows such as Normal People, and podcasts like Come As You Are have introduced these discussions to broader audiences. These depictions help reshape opinions by framing sexual interests as a complex aspect of identity. Social media platforms such as Reddit, TikTok, and X also foster the space to engage these complexities through meaningful conversations. Here, individuals share experiences and seek answers to explore their interests and curiosities.
For most people, the biggest barrier to self-exploration isn’t a lack of curiosity, but the fear of judgment.
One of the most notable examples of this shift in mainstream media is Netflix’s Sex Education. Praised by critics and audiences for its refreshing approach to diversity and sexuality, the series skillfully explores a wide array of sexual interests, from BDSM to asexuality. Its humour doesn’t come from mocking these topics but from portraying the relatable awkwardness teenagers face while navigating relationships. The show thoughtfully examines themes of consent, reproductive health, identity, and sex positivity without diluting their importance.
Sex Education sparks discussions around these subjects much like Sex and the City explored sexual liberation, Fleabag confronted complex relationships and desire, and Secretary challenged traditional ideas about BDSM and power dynamics.
Beyond the taboo
Despite increasing openness about sex, interest in BDSM or foot fetishes still often raises eyebrows. People tend to follow unspoken rules about what is and isn’t sexually acceptable, and conversations about kinks or fetishes are frequently seen as inappropriate, depending on the time and place.
Research from the Westland Academy of Clinical Sex Therapy reveals that cultural and gender norms significantly influence perceptions of when and where discussions about kinks and fetishes are deemed acceptable.
For most people, the biggest barrier to self-exploration isn’t a lack of curiosity, but the fear of judgment. Concerns about rejection or discomfort often discourage individuals from sharing or exploring their kinks with partners, underscoring that many fantasies remain excluded from mainstream acceptable despite societal progress.
University students are often at the forefront of self-discovery. For many, being in university is a time to push boundaries, redefine what is acceptable, and transform conversations about sexuality.
Despite progress toward greater acceptance, we must move beyond surface-level acknowledgment of these topics. What we need most are education, respect, and open minds. A world where desires can be explored without shame is closer than ever. We may not be there yet, but we’re definitely moving forward.
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